Rating (.5 out of 5)

Summary: From the very first scene all the way through the bitter end, this movie was horrible. The dialogue could be the worst of the year may be of even this decade. I am not sure if there was a scene where I didn’t cringe or laugh out loud. The plot is extremely mechanical attempting to manufacture an emotional response. For me, it triggered a gag response.

I don’t understand how this didn’t get a Razzie. This actually makes “Happy Time Murders” and “Baywatch” look good. To think there are movies that are worse than “Geostorm” is unimaginable.

Plot: The world wide weather maintenance system “Dutch Boy” seems to be malfunctioning, and Jake Lawson (Gerard Butler) is sent to the space station to investigate. While on earth, his brother, Max Lawson (Jim Sturgess) investigates the problems on earth. This must hurry before the Geostorms kills billions.

Detail: If you are curious about the film, watch the first scene, which is a Senate hearing. The set was not even a senate looking building. Then he supposedly trots in an hour late, because he just flew in from the space station. Please! Then only one senator asks questions and they argue back and forth, and the session ends in 10 minutes. It was horrible, and that is the movie in a nutshell.

1/2 the movie is dedicated to special effects of disasters on buildings and people. Like the beach in Brazil where everyone is frozen. I blame Armageddon and Independence Day for the love of these types of shots now. I have seen it before, thanks, nothing special now.

The movie is bad through and through, but I had to lower my score to .5 with the president rescue scene. Beginning to end nonsense, but the piece de resistance was when Sarah Wilson (Abbie Cornish) rotates her electric cab around and then sticks her gun out the window while driving backwards, 6 shots right through the drivers window of the chasing car, and then rotates the car around. All of this during a highly volatile electricity storm, where lightning is blowing up the elevated freeway above them.

The best part of the movie is the realization that actors are just like you and me, and have to work for a paycheck. Why else would Ed Harris and Andy Garcia participate in this disaster (literally not genre) of a film?