Pet Semetary (2019) – not in a good way

 

As a fan of Stephen King books, and a fan of most of the film adaptations (IT, Carrie, Misery), I was super excited to go see Pet Semetary (2019). As well as this, yes of course the 1989 version was pretty cheesy, but it was by far better than the new one.

For the sake of length, I’m not going to summarize the plot a ton because I’m assuming we all already have an idea of what it’s about. The first point I want to make is that this movie has one of the most poorly paced timelines I have ever seen. Within the first five minutes of the film, we see a semi-truck zoom past the Creed family and their new house, right in front of a street that semis frequent. We also see the actual Pet Semetary, so now in the first five minutes, we have basically seen the whole plot of the film. The problem with the pace of the timeline is that it also lacks the buildup between characters necessary to make any of them feel relatable. By the end of the movie, let’s just say (SPOILER), I was happy everyone who died did.

Another aspect of this movie that ultimately turned me off from it was the lack of anything creepy or scary. Going into this as someone who has read the book and seen the first version of the movie, I knew I wouldn’t get as scared as other people, but I disappointed to realize that it was missing anything new or innovative in terms of the creation of the movie to make it more disturbing. The physical pet semetary looks like a fake prop set. On top of that, the woodpile/mountain couldn’t be less menacing. It looks like a pile of twigs, and for the record, not very hard to get up.

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The movie had nothing physically scary, and the plotline matched. Victor Pascow was the scariest and most intense part of the book for me, and the image in this movie was one who had no importance. Dennis Widmyer, the director, has never really made a popular movie aside from this from what I can tell on IMDb. This is clear especially in the fact everything could have been much more intimidating than it was. When the daughter gets hits by the semi truck, she has NO BLOOD on her face. C’mon, not possible. Another example is when the daughter comes back from the dead, yeah they rearranged an eyeball, but it felt more Cabin In The Woods (2011) than anything. The only difference is it works in Cabin In The Woods. Once again, it feels like as time progressed we could have made something a little more disturbing than what we had seen before.

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Overall, I’m going to give this movie 1/5 stars. IT (2017) hyped up everyone too much for a movie that shouldn’t have been made in the first place. The only reason I would ever watch this is if it was in a Redbox or on T.V.

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